|| bEdbugs mArcHing sOng ||

bedbugs
have the right
to bite.

bedbugs
of the world
unite.

don’t let
these humans
sleep too tight.

~ john agard
from “poems to make your friends scream”

^^ wORld fAmous …

Only if you are creative and original enough (read: too much time to waste) to try googling totally random works of art like “peanut butter and slime”…

Yes, we’ve emerged Number One on the search results. A further testament that we are definitely a force to be reckoned with.

*EVIL LAUGHTER*

bRing your “fRiend” home…not…

clearly not happening…

bRing a “fRiend” to work day…

hmmmmm..that’s something quite hard to define… “friend”?..

A gift for the pests out there…

I find it utterly amusing when incompetent nincompoops see a right to criticise and comment on other people’s abilities.. Be it about work, about properly flushing the toilet, about the correct way of pronunciation, or whatever. When they behave like this, I really cannot help but smile. And naturally, they get imminently more and more pissed off when they see that I am seemingly unaffected by what they say, and in fact, rather enjoying the moment.

To tell you the truth, I have an even bigger right to berate them back for making me waste my effort to wipe their disgusting and disease-ridden saliva from my face. Yes, it takes effort to clean the sh*t off, to go to the toilet and wash thy hands and face, and to come out and spray Dettol to sterilise the crime scene. I should really charge them by the minute actually.

And do you know what is worse than this? Incompetent nincompoops who actually BELIEVE they can plant negative thoughts into you, and BELIEVE they can actually make you willingly leave the company, yet offering a sympathetic shoulder to you, telling you they understand how unfair the world is. Well done, I say. Impressive way to waste one’s time.

So for all these pests out there, I would like to spit in your face for wasting my time and for you wasting a space on this precious earth. To drive in my point, I would like to bestow upon you a nice a little gift I saw on the glorious World Wide Web.. See below for lovely present.. Now, don’t say we don’t appreciate your nasty thoughts!

dear freddy…

for my fiend who has always loved me…

in her own bloody ways..

love,

chucky

The evil twin is missing..

Hello all fiends out there,

Fiend Chucky has flown off to sun-shiny island of Bali for some diving thingy. We wish her a safe and enjoyable trip, and hopes she brings back some sea urchins so that we can replenish our supply of toothpicks..

Be safe chucky… Don’t dive off too far, and if a sea turtle beckons, don’t follow it. It could be a trap to lead to you babysit their eggs.

Love, Freddy

freddy is …running…

from her bath buddies..

and she definitely needs a huge “feng you” to fend off the buggies..

time to dig into some energy replenishment after bloody battle with the monsters..

Escaping the heat…

Freddy: I was trying to escape from the blasted heat of late by thinking i could perhaps return to my roots and hang around some trees. Whilst dangling precariously on some durian trees, some stuff caught my eye… Thought I’d share it with our fellow fiends out there.

 

Check this out. Stone toadstools. This goes to show… We are all doomed to die and turn into  rocks under all this heat.

Fancy your own personal ride? What is better than a top-down, wind-in-your-face, good looking mustang?

Buy your own horse, I say… You can control the horsepower.. (sheesh, I can be sooo lame sometimes.)

And if you are one of those human beans who buys pets and then abandon them for whatever selfish reasons you can conjure, please, leave this page, and go shoot yourself or something. Just make sure it’s real painful.

* freddy and chucky spit on you :: cucky

The word we’d like to share with you today is: Cucky

As defined in Freddy’s psychedelic dictionary, it is defined as: “The name given to Chucky when she feels an incontrollable need to chase someone away by pecking them to death.”

Example:

Chucky: That shameless sonofagun is in my marked territory again and annoying the sh*t out of me.

Freddy: Go ahead. Do your Cucky thing. I’m sure he’d get the message.